Monday, January 8, 2018

Pains of being a Writer

At the mercy of the sea I sat at a fisherman's hut reading 'Slow Man'. It was a great novel filled with impeccable writing and readable contents.

The beach was a mere ten feet away from my chair, which was just a bamboo bed built for the fisher folk to rest or sit after their fishing work. That means the tsunami can wipe me away making my life more peaceful. Olive green waters rose and swam back into their own hands by licking into the salty sand with happy hopes of wiping away humanity.

I was an outsider by all means with my book and my need to digest words and write them back.
After an hour of reading I had to close my book for the fisher folk had arrived earlier than usual. 'Off you go away'. 'You mongrel' typical of Indian hospitality. Perhaps they smelt my 'readingness' from afar.

And as usual I had to let go off my perch and leave for the streets. The street lay ahead like a flattened snake circling around a faith center which had departed people in the grave yard. I looked at them with surprised eyebrows to find out what pain they endured to be lying there and turning into beautiful pink flowers.

The writer in my country is a rarest specie that seldom is seen. I always try to befriend writers in a faint hope of creating a writers group where we can share and learn from each others writing. But I guess writers are solitary and cannot mingle. Yet I have been witness to colleagues busy in chat and masala talks about the previous days adventures, and nothing vaguely related to writing ever crossed their conversations, ...ever!

Yet I always longed to be circled by writers, young and impatient who wanted to get the words off their chest. Perhaps I never approached the right crowds in this endeavor. It never occurred to me that I was paddling the same boat at the same place for decades and there isn't any water left to take me across to the other bank.

Why couldn't I be like those happy writers in newspaper publishing houses brimming with assignments to travel the seas and explore the world and also write about it? Why was I this unfortunate writer who was always verbally abused for sitting at my desk and writing? Why should I be this joker or porn star entertaining people with my body and verbal skills?

Isn't being a writer more than enough to be one? Should I wear so many hats to remain a writer? These are just few of the pains while being a writer.

One of the most saddest part in my life is the constant presence of evil. Out of nowhere comes a person who disrupts my writing. I don't know who these people are!

Whenever I sit to write in my room I get loud noises and banging on my door. They don't want me to write. They don't want me to live. They want me dead!

It's not a joke it is a fact of my sad story. The only place I am allowed to write in India is a browsing center where people aren't bothered about my presence and are happy to get a price for the time I spend there. A business proposition I suppose.

But that mans just to write for an hour I need to offer a dollar or more.

This is my situation. A group of people waiting to disrupt my writing and anther group in the office waiting to verbally abuse me. I sometime wonder how other writers are allowed to write in peace.Do they have a magic in their hands to get hours of peaceful writing time? How do they do it?

This is my pain. Not being able to write because I wasn't born to think or write. The society decides what I must do. Why do I have to live like this? Rather cut my veins and lie obscure waiting for the graves.     

Sunday, December 31, 2017

P.S SUBJECT: Don't Leave Me Alone 2017

Dear 2017,

You were as evidently and truly been my only friend in the past 364 days. Today you are leaving me all alone in the dark.

This year I found out many truths about myself. I found out that my body has decided to take matters on itself rather than wait for me.

The darkness grew wider in the mid months and you still held a light in the form of my friend whom I never met.

My body wanted to runaway in the streets like a mad man.

And I wanted to kill myself like the disabled young man who was dragged and drugged.

And he was left to die in the vegetable market since he had no hands.

'Good kids' (from well to do families) wanted to show him what 'fun' life is when people can do anything to your body and you sit disabled and die.

Three more girls were murdered and one left to die but escaped. The people around couldn't believe their eyes.

Few more children were killed using latest technologies.

Small groups understood the power of larger groups and so decided to give away their kids to large rich families and they never heard of them again.

Some people cheated me with my money some people cheated me with false love.

All in all I cried an cried more than ever in front of my boss requesting that I don't want to be verbally abused any more.

Verbal abusers found new ways to torment my ears and torture my soul, their words directly made a wound in my already bleeding and patched up heart.

People started to violently abuse me for the first time perhaps they know now that I don't have anyone.

Aimlessly I wandered in the streets like a mad man searching for a clue about my existence.

Where do I live?  Where do I go? Where did I come from? I don't know.

Crows and dogs comforted me by smiling and wagging their tails and greeting saying 'Oh you are one among us now.'

Yes, I replied.

'I am with you now.'

I had a past. I had a future but today I don't know who I am.

Crying is not helping me anymore because there is no channel for the tears to flow.

No way to go! Absolutely nothing!

Oh 2017 you know how to force a person into becoming a slave.

Perhaps now I know I am slave. A slave to young and sweet people who trample me under their shoes.

They press hard until my brain freezes and bleeds.

That's my life if you love to hear bed time stories.

Insults, Verbal abuses and physical threats!

Now I know why I have freedom and rights.

I have the right to remain silent when young beautiful people kick my bruised ears with their words and spread rumors about my past. 

A past that I myself am not aware of!

How do these young managers know about my past?

Is it written on my face.

And a dark spirit followed me where ever I went.

I felt warm in the presence of a ghost.

Perhaps the ghost understood that I am one among them now.

Tears flow endlessly as I enter a new dawn tomorrow.

When all is lost, why does one need hope

I hope that - you the reader understands better and goes on to win the coming year.

Oh 2017 you are leaving me alone.

A loner has only his shadow to cry on.

I have lost!

Sincere Regrets and Regards

Nikhil Sukumaran - Still a victim of verbal abuse, rumors and bullying.

Tuesday, February 7, 2017

Ten Most rare and innocent White flowers

White electrifies our gaze with nobility, innocence, honesty and inner integrity. White tone echoes the lost innocence of childhood. Yet, these pretty blossoms glitter with glee.
  1. White Lupines-This flower belongs to a genus of flowering plants from Fabaceae, the legume family. The genus contains over 200 species, with main habitats in North and South America. Fewer habitats also are seen in North Africa and the Mediterranean. Seeds of many species of lupins have been known as food before 3000 years near the Mediterranean and even before 6000 years in the Andean highland. Unfortunately, they don't enjoy the same royalty as soybeans, dry peas, and other pulses. 'White Lupines stand like torchlights in a garden of hope.'
  2. The Snake Gourd Flower-The snake gourd belongs to the gourd vine family suited to subtropical and tropical growing wildly as thick bushes in the borders of forests and clearings of Korea, India, China and southeast Asia. Though it resembles cucumber due to the long stem, the design, and reach of the leaves. The different aspect is that it produces amazing white flowers containing stunning and delicate filaments. 'White Gourd you stand guard to protect our fairy tales.'

  3. Helichrysum bracteatum ‘Double White’-These flowers like the Spring season to late Fall on this TALL (to 4’ tall by 3’ wide) & strong  Strawflower that creates a multitude of startling, 3 inches long, geometric blossoms. Two rows of white sharp petals emerge from intoxicating, sunny golden-yellow centers. You may even dry some to save them for quite a long time.'Double white you double the power of inner beauty.'
  4. Aquilegia 'Munstead White'-This flower contains sculptural, tiered blossoms of noble greenish-white tinge. It likes to shine outwards from the light shade. 'Munstead White you shine to release knowledge.'
  5. The attractive whites are classic cottage garden flowers which blossom from spring to beginning of summer, with the flowers dancing pretty hooped skirt.'White dancers who dance away their pain to bring joy.'
  6. Grass of Parnassus-this rare flower is actually a grass, instead of using its common name from the translucent green stripes that adorn the white petals of this cup-shaped flower. There was a time it was commonly found, yet now the plant is confined to wet marshes, moors, and pastures, predominantly in the northern UK, et they are seen in the Norfolk fens and Broads and also in localized bushes in the south. It blossoms from June to September. Grass of hope you stand tall like a prince from the land of Zen hopes.'
  7. The white-flowered type from Justicia carnea, the plume flower from Brazil. Picture from 'White Chandeliers you lead us to victory.'
  8. White Powderpuff-white Calliandra haematocephala Alba - 
    This is quite a rare white powder-puff. It is a huge bushy shrub creating sexy white flowers from spring to summer. The plant is usually cold hardy. fast producing. Picture from' Powder puff or power puff your radiance emit stunning vibrancy.'
  9. Bear Grass Flower-Xerophyllum tenax- The white flowers have light aroma and bud from a tall stalk that bolts from the base. When they bloom they are closely packed at the end of the stalk like a standing club. The plant is seen usually in western North America from British Columbia south to California and east to Wyoming, in subalpine meadows and coastal mountains, and also on the bottom grounds in the California coastal fog belt and towards the far south as Monterey County. It is natural in the northern Sierra Nevada, Rockies, Cascades and on the Olympic Peninsula. 'Delicate yet strong you prove innocence has rightfully born.'
  10.  Snow Queen Protea; Protea is both the botanical name and the English common name of a genus of South African flowering plants, sometimes also called sugarbushes. In local tradition, the Protea flower represents change and hope. 'Snow Queen of the greatest hope.'

  11. Wijaya kusuma - Epiphyllum oxypetalum (Dutchman's pipe cactus or queen of the night[citation needed]) is a species of cactus and one of the most cultivated species in the genus. E. oxypetalum blooms rarely and only at night, and its flowers wilt before dawn. Though it is sometimes referred to as a night blooming cereusThere are several stories about the flower known as bunga wijaya kusuma in Indonesia (bunga refers to flower). It is said that the old kings (in Indonesia, that is) who were about to be crowned must pluck this flower while in full bloom. It is also said that those who see this flower in full bloom will have good luck. Well, that’s nice, isn’t it? 'Queen of all Nights you give us eternal luck.'
  12. White Camilia- Camellia is a broadleaf woody plant native to South Eastern Asia, Bhutan, Japan and China. The name Camellia honors the Jesuit priest George. Picture from 'Camilia you bring delicate contentment to the seeker'
  13. White Egret orchid-Pecteilis radiata is a rare species of orchid seen Russia, Japan, Korean and China. It is usually called as the White Egret Flower, Fringed Orchid or Sagiso. 'May the White Egret bring you new life.'

Thursday, January 19, 2017

Ten mystical and exceptional blue flower species

We are always busy searching for love in the rarest situations! Today let's search for the top blue rarest flowers in the world. These flowers are nature's wisdom gift to the world. Some of these flowers are strange but then they embrace their strangeness unlike us.

The hunt for the extraordinary blue blooms begins here:


Picture courtesy www.dimagio-flowers.

Orchids are rare flowers that bloom in the rain forests. they are found on the tall trees and tall rocks. They need water and sunlight and are clever enough use other trees as their base. Doesn't this flower look perfect?

'Blue Orchid lead us to the light blue zen of love'


Picture courtesy shardy from pixabay

I know these aren't rare but I see mystic beauty in them. Blue bells or English Blue Bells 

are an exotic bloom that is a sight to behold.

'Blue dreams bring inner haven realms'


Picture courtesy 

Well, Passion flower is the flower of the passion fruit but I couldn't resist adding it in these blue delicacies. 

'May your days fill you with violet and blue passion'


Picture courtesy

I don't know anything about this flower. If anyone knows anything about this flower please add your information in the comments. I would love to know about this rarity.

'Rare blue friend your beautyis intoxicating me into loving the world again'


Picture courtesy

These zebra flowers are awe inspiring. Detailed violet-blue lines over the white petals. The center has a yellow circle that attracts your attention easily! I don't think this plant survives the tropics. Primula 'Zebra Blue' was created by Belgium's, Stijn van Hoecke at the Rudy Raes company.

'Lines of imperfections are actually lines of victory'


Picture courtesy

Morning glories come in diverse tones and sizes. These just create a lush garden affect in any home. look at the white flowers as though someone created bathic paintings on them and the purple mouth. Bring these glories and see your mornings become divine conversations with nature.

'Sometimes white and blue means a true welcome to each birth'


Picture courtesy

This flower looks ethereal with its petals almost like a dress. And the orange bouquet carried by the central bride with a green dress and light blue hat. Phenomenal flower.

'May the poppy from the mountains of Tibet whisper the wisdom of luv to you'


This flower resembles cherry blossoms. If anyone knows anything about this flower, just add your comments down. I would love to know more about this rare flower. The petals look like they are geometrically perfect. And the white bouquets in the center brings happiness that is infinite.

'Oh blue cherry blossoms won't you bring infinite smiles'


Picture courtesy

The geraniums are famous all over the world. This flower looks differently blue. The flower tells us how perfect we are all. Perfection is not a label. It is within each person. It's the will to shine even if others try hard to bring you down. 

'May the blue and violet shimmers sing your praises each day'


This flower looks like a Christmas tree from our wildest fantasies. The sapphire blue reminds us of the stone and the seas.It belongs to the highlands of Chile and flowers once in 10 years. The blossoms kill the plant once it blooms. But the seeds carry the next generation! Relative to the tasty Pineapple plant.

'Hope the end of a stage is seen as a new beginning'

Type in your comments and missing information regarding these blossoms. Add your own data in the comments and I will add them to this lovely collection. How many own these rare beauties? See these wonders and imagine the inner secrets of nature. If nature didn't love you it wouldn't create such attractive shades. Don't lose hope ever. Come back here for such mind calming zen posts. See you soon.Smile.